I am sad
my opa is gone. part of me feels bad that i didnt get to see him before he died. and part of me still thinks ok with it, because i at least called 4 times a month. every sunday, at 11 am my time. for them 7 am. they always got up early. I spoke with my oma on sunday like i do all the time. we spoke about the H1N1 and if i wanted to get the shot or not. i said i didnt want to, and she is telling me all the reasons why that i need to. lol... and i ask how opa is right after that, and she said that he was good and watching tv on his chair. i can still just picture her looking at him, because i know where her phone is in her kitchen as she can see in the living room. its like im looking at it right now. its just weird. I want to go home, but i cant right now. Oma says i cannot, she wants to be alone just for a bit. i have to do what she asks.
other than that.. im trying to get out a bit. i decided to go to chapters and get a couple books, and a couple online... and that was ok when we were walking outside, then i get this stupid ass that wants us to sign those animal testing/abused animals desks outside. and says to me... hey, (after i didnt stop to sign) you know the sun is down.... yes fucker, i do. its dark out, and my eyes are all puffed up and bloodshot....because someone i love just died, and i decided to go out instead of resting at home.... and P.S.... i am vegetarian (you are probably not), i sign those every time i pass it, always... and my opa died.. so fuck you and your stupid words. think before you say something ashhole.
i got a great birth book 0-2 years, and today went back to get the pregnancy book (duh, i didnt do that first) and ordered a couple online.. the 3 am handbook and a couple lesbian pregnancy books.. that should come in 1-2 weeks. which i am so excited about... i got The Lesbian Parenting Book: a Guide to Creating Families and Raising Children, and The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: How to Stay Sane and Care for Yourself From Pre-Concep book.. excited to read those.
i made a couple things, the pancakes that i made on sunday morning before i spoke with oma.


Gia eating my pasta... like actually eating it.. she always eats just my pasta... i have always other food for her but never wants it.. only pasta.. shes my little italian gatto.. aww.

Me roller skating in the house before the pancakes, and before the oma call.

Gia in liliou's playpen

made a mushroom soup with some wild mushrooms and regular mushrooms.

and thats it. i went to work today, but only ended up staying until 2... i just couldnt stay.
so i just watch tv tonight, and let isabelle go to change her winter tires this evening.